» vocations

February 2: World Day for Consecrated Life

Therese Ivers, JCL — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 15:03:50 +0000

Table of contents for Congress Pilgrimage 2008 Rome

by Therese Ivers, JCL, OCV

His Holiness the Pope rarely presides over public liturgies. The importance of World Day for Consecrated Life is such that he prays Vespers and gives an official address on each Feast of the Presentation to consecrated persons. Since the Marian (consecrated life) dimension of the Church is as essential as the Petrine (ordained life) in the life of the Church according to our Holy Father, dioceses should take their cue from Rome and also host celebrations for Consecrated Life in their cathedrals. It is the one day that the Church prays for the consecrated, that is, for those of us who normally pray for the rest of the Church!

The Vicariate of Rome issued the invitation to the Papal Vespers and Address to religious superiors, religious, consecrated virgins, members of secular institutes, members of apostolic societies, hermits, and others in consecrated life living in Rome. For those who don’t know, the Vicariate of Rome functions as the “diocese” of Rome and govern in the name of the Pope. There is a bishop assigned for consecrated persons. I found it ironic that in the official invitation, the Vicariate mentioned that the contemplative (cloistered) religious would be spiritually present, and yet hermits were invited. Perhaps it was an official oversight in terms of the incongruity. Or, perhaps the Vicariate wanted to make it clear that this is one occasion in which it is very appropriate for the hermit to leave his/her hermitage and join the other consecrated persons in celebrating this day in the cathedral. It is heartening, however, that the Vicariate did not limit its invitation to religious. Now I just wait with bated breath – not really – for a consecrated virgin to be one of those selected to have some part in the ceremony as I noticed that only habited religious were chosen this year. At any rate, it is my fervent hope that dioceses will follow the example of the Vicariate of Rome and remember to include consecrated virgins and hermits in their mailings.

On a personal note, yours truly was able to participate in this Liturgy with another consecrated virgin, Jenna Cooper, the author of a blog on consecrated virginity. We disagree on many practical interpretations of how our vocation is to be lived out but we are united in the love of our Divine Spouse and total self gift to the Lord. Speaking of consecrated virgins, on my way home from the papal liturgy, I passed the place where the International Congress for Consecrated Virgins was held in 2008. It brought back so many memories of the 500+ virgins who attended from over 52 countries.

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Ten Tips for Vocational Discernment

Therese Ivers, JCL — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 21:44:07 +0000

by Therese Ivers, JCL

Happy New Year! Here’s a list of some discernment tips that I hope will get your creative juices flowing in terms of shaping this years discernment process New Years resolutions… Since each tip can be the topic of a whole book in and of itself, you are welcome to share your thoughts on them and share stories by going to the forum and commenting.

Our Lady, Pray for Us!

1) Do take the time to get to know all of your vocational options.
2) Starting a religious community? Do wait until you have a few actual members together before you begin to approach the bishop.
3) Do think of the ways you can grow so as to offer the best possible version of yourself to your potential spouse, diocese, or community.
4) Do you think you’ll be more holy… if you become a sister, a monk, a priest, or get married? Try sanctifying your daily actions now!
5) Do look at vocations in their nitty gritty aspects long term, not just the wedding day, the profession day, or day of consecration.
6) If you are living alone but regularly leave your home for more than a few hours a week, don’t put in an application to your bishop to become a diocesan hermit.
7) If you believe that the acts proper to the generation of children are sinful, ugly, or horrifying, or for any other (non medical) reason would be unwilling to consummate marriage vows, please do not get engaged or start seriously discerning celibate forms of life.
If you are a man, don’t sign up for the seminary for the diocesan priesthood until you have seriously examined religious life as a brother.
9) If you are a female virgin, don’t apply to become a consecrated virgin if you have not for some time lived out the resolution to perpetually remain a virgin regardless of whether you’ll be able to receive the consecration in the future.
10) If you are thinking about religious life, don’t join a community just because your spiritual director likes it or because you see that the brothers/sisters in it are joyful and happy.

Join the forum discussion on this post

Disbanded by the Archbishop’s Orders: The Intercessors of the Lamb

Therese Ivers, JCL — Thu, 21 Oct 2010 23:46:06 +0000

by Therese Ivers, JCL

One of the purposes of this website is to give tools to those discerning their vocation to help enable them to make an informed decision. I have not been posting on this site too often lately because I have been focusing on writing a book for those thinking about the religious life. This book is about the nuts and bolts of evaluating a prospective convent/abbey/monastery as a possible “fit” for oneself. While I have drafted what I think is a catchy title for this book, I think about it in terms of “the good, the bad, and the ugly of religious life”. Why? Because in looking at a community, one must often use a similar technique that one would use in being prudent about a potential spouse. By knowing the good, the bad, and the ugly about many marriages, one can learn to evaluate the possible compatibility of another human being as a prospective spouse. Now, my book has (at the moment) nothing to do directly with the Intercessors of the Lamb. However, part of what I am trying to do is alert people to important aspects of community life which may be disruptive or injurious to one’s own well-being because certain “red flags” were ignored, and I think that while these things will be covered in great detail in my upcoming guide, some of the problems which were highlighted before the suppression of the Intercessors of the Lamb can furnish some food for thought for those discerning religious life in the meantime.

The lay association called the Intercessors of the Lamb (IOL) had contacted the Archdiocese of Omaha to see if they could take the next step in reaching a more serious level of canonical standing within the Church. As a Public Association of the Faithful, the Intercessors of the Lamb in the Church were like a civil corporation within the US- they were a group with a common identity, written statutes, a board, etc. They wanted to go beyond simple “incorporation” in the Church and become a recognized institute or society that lived a consecrated lifestyle in the Church. However, the canon lawyer who was hired by the Archbishop to evaluate the community’s readiness to take the next step found that there were serious problems within the community. Shortly after an attempt was made to begin addressing these problems by putting in place a new “superior”, the group was officially disbanded because the lay board of the community refused to cooperate with the Archbishop of Omaha. Of course, hindsight is often 20/20, but I would like to point out some of the things an informed discerner could have looked out for if he or she had been seriously considering joining the Intercessors of the Lamb.

Reasons Why Knowing the Canonical Status of a Community is Important

1. Only members of Diocesan-right or Pontifical-Right Religious Institutes are religious and enjoy the rights of religious and the obligations of religious. Vowed members of such Religious Institutes are in the consecrated state. The Intercessors of the Lamb, contrary to popular opinion, were NEVER a religious institute and its members were not in the consecrated state. “Consecrated” or vowed Members had some of the trappings of religious life: a habit, vows, chapel, statutes, etc., but they were not recognized in the Church as true religious. Why? Because they were in the more risky (to discerners) stage of being a Public Association of the Faithful. While they had the intention and hope of eventually following some kind of consecrated lifestyle in a form approved by the Church, the Intercessors of the Lamb had the same status as any other Public Association of the Faithful (think Legion of Mary, Worldwide Marriage Encounter, etc.). A good percentage of Public Associations of the Faithful who wish to become a Religious Institute or evolve into a Secular Institute or a Society of Apostolic Life simply fold, fizzle out, are suppressed, or disintegrate for a variety of reasons. Oftentimes, it is because there are unhealthy practices within the community, shady financial practices, personality struggles, etc. The bottom line is that even people with vows in a Public Association of the Faithful remain lay (if non-ordained) because they are not in a Religious Institute.

2. A good percentage of Public Associations of the Faithful who desire to evolve into a recognized form of consecrated life fold. This can have a detrimental effect to your livelihood and future if you were to join one and it was disbanded or the leaders ran off with the money or the superior kicks you out because you have a personality clash. Please understand that the Archdiocese of Omaha is being extraordinarily helpful to the former members of the now suppressed IOL. Since the members were NOT religious, the Archdiocese was not obligated in law to provide for the material needs of the ex-members any more than a diocese would be obligated to support (for a time) an ex-member of the Legion of Mary or Knights of Columbus. (As a side note, I find it quite interesting and perhaps not entirely coincidental that it was the “lay” branch that controlled the finances (all of the group was lay, but the “lay” branch indicated by the news probably refers to the associated members who did not take the private vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience) that was the portion of the IOL that refused to cooperate with the Archbishop. It was those members who had donated their money before entering with their private vows who suffered from their private vow of poverty as a result.) The moral of the story for discerners who are thinking about joining a community that wants to be a religious institute or live a consecrated lifestyle eventually is that the aid given to the ex-members of the IOL by the Archdiocese is extraordinary. Finances are usually tight for start-up groups, and if you leave or it disintegrates or is suppressed, you can usually count on being practically on the street with little or no money to restart your life. Let me say this again. Even with established religious Orders, ex-members have been known to have been given a plane ticket and $250-$500 to begin anew. I suppose that’d buy you a tent and a suit for job interviews but little else. Have no family? That’s just your tough luck. Perhaps a homeless shelter will take care of you until you get on your feet.

Coming Next: Why Canonist Pete Vere’s signs could have been helpful for the person who was discerning the IOL. As I am planning a series on the Intercessors, if you have any questions or comments about Public Associations of the Faithful or the suppressed Intercessors of the Lamb, please feel free to comment on these posts or use the contact us form.

www.DoIHaveAVocation.com

The Thursday Q & A

Therese Ivers, JCL — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 10:20:56 +0000

Q. I am a widow. What are my vocational options?
A. If you are a Roman Catholic widow, you are called to live the universal call to holiness. It may be that you have been given a call within a call and that you might be called to marriage, to the religious life, to a society of apostolic life, to become a member of a secular institute, or perhaps to privately dedicate your life to Christ through a life-long private vow of chastity. Of course, it is essential for good discernment that a widow have
gone through a sufficient grieving and adjustment period before seriously contemplating possibly taking on a new life-long commitment.

NB. Eastern Catholic widows have the additional possibility of entering the consecrated state as a consecrated widow should they be admitted to this by their local hierarch.

www.DoIHaveAVocation.com

St. Teresa of the Andes & Chapel Rats

Therese Ivers, JCL — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 18:52:32 +0000

by Therese Ivers, JCL

One day, as I was helping out a friend in the sacristy, she mentioned something about “the chapel rats”. My friend was not referring to rats scurrying about – for as far as I know, there were none in the building. Rather, she was talking about those who spend practically all their time in the chapel, every day, in the mistaken notion that it is more holy to spend one’s life in the chapel or one one’s knees rather than to lead a balanced lifestyle. This tends to be a common error in those discerning their vocations.

People who are single who are discerning their vocations should pray, yes. Prayer is very good thing. But to spend 4, 5 hours a day in the church, working at a job, and then spending another hour or two on spiritual reading and research on communities or charisms each day is usually unwise. Why? Because the laity have a special mission in the world. They should participate in a prudent manner in the civic, social, family, and spiritual spheres. Volunteering, political activism (even just folding envelopes), building family and social ties, getting enough exercise, healthy meals, etc. are proper activities for those who are free from community or spousal ties. These should all have a slot on a single person’s calendar.

The role of the laity is to be beacons of light in the world. Lay persons, especially singles, whether they are minors or whether they are working adults, should live out their state in life according to their circumstances. In certain areas, it may be too dangerous for a young, single woman to minister directly to the homeless. But surely she can help someone learn to read or volunteer for a day to bring meals to a family in need or do some work of corporal or spiritual work of charity. A man might consider helping out single mothers with repairs around the house (observing all proprieties) or doing a spiritual or corporal work of mercy on a regular basis or as they are called for.

The single person should not forget that he/she is a human being. Having appropriate hobbies, growing in knowledge, interacting with other people and families, participating in cultural enrichment activities, etc. is an integral part of developing one’s humanity. Of course, a person might object, “I’m discerning a vocation! I’m in a different situation than other singles. I need to be holy and learn what God is calling me to. It’s a waste of time to be normal and participate in all these ‘worldly’ activities!”

Again, it is extremely important that the single person pray, do a daily examination of conscience, go to Mass frequently, etc. However, the Church reminds us that the laity have a mission in the world. If you don’t know where you are being called whether by vow, ordination, or consecration, the holy thing and proper thing to do is to live your state in life well and fully. Even if you know you’re being called to the ordained life or consecrated life or marriage, for now you are still single and lay!

Is it too “worldly” to be active in politics, volunteerism, etc.? Will it make a person less “holy”? Will it distract me from God? The answer to this question is that if these activities are done well, prudently, and in accordance with one’s path as discerned in the concrete circumstances of life, they should help the person to grow in holiness, their humanity, and happiness.

To my mind, St. Teresa of the Andes is a perfect “modern” example of how holiness can be found in every day life. Most of St. Teresa’s life was lived as a lay person. She was great at sports, loved airplanes, went horseback riding, went to the opera, played the piano, took care of a poor orphan, lived a social life… and yet, she was extremely holy! It was only the last 11 months of her life that she became a nun. She agonized over her discernment – like so many people do today. She didn’t know which order she was called to. But, while she was discerning and growing up, she lived a normal lifestyle for the people in her family situation. Yes, she prayed, prayed intensely, but she also partied. She was a lay woman, and she was very holy.

It is because I think St. Teresa of the Andes is an attractive, easy to relate to saint, that I spent quite a bit of time contacting people in Chile, EWTN, and other places to see how the TV series on her life could be republished on VHS or DVD a couple years ago. This series is one of my favorite movies because it shows how a person can be normal and holy and that a holy person is surrounded by the same problems everyone else is. To my great delight, I just discovered that Ignatius Press has released the series in DVD format. If you wish to help support the work of this website, you can order this set below by clicking on the picture:

College Education Part II- Choosing A College When Discerning

Therese Ivers, JCL — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 01:38:51 +0000

Table of contents for College Education

College Education Part I- Should Cloistered Nuns Have A College Education?
College Education Part II- Choosing A College When Discerning

by Therese Ivers, JCL

Dan would like to become a priest. He is a high school senior and believes that he has a vocation to the diocesan priesthood. Mary Ellen is also a senior in high school and is thinking about joining a cloistered order. Should she go to college, and if so, where? The decision of whether to go to college is one of the more important decisions that many discerners must make on their vocational journey. For those of you agonizing over this decision, I would like to offer some tips which may help.

Tip #1 Know Your Ultimate Goal

What do you want to achieve with your education? Do you know the difference between vocational training and education which enriches the whole person? If you don’t, you may want to check out this document which I believe everyone who is thinking of investing tens of thousands of dollars and years of their life in college should sit down and read and understand.

Tip #2 Know Your Pocketbook

If you are considering joining religious life, you should be aware of the fact that religious orders cannot accept candidates who are burdened with debt. Today people can graduate with tens of thousands of dollars in student loans. This can delay entrance for 5, 10, 15, 20 years. In today’s economy, when there is a high unemployment rate, paying off such loans in a timely manner is not always possible.

If the main goal is to get a college education in a particular field to fulfill entrance requirements for a religious order or the degree needed before entering major seminary, then consider finding the cheapest BA or BS degree program, which may include several semesters of junior or community college. Obviously, you can hunt down grants, scholarships, etc. Even if you don’t plan on majoring in math, do some figure crunching.

Know your numbers. Be creative. For example, one private Catholic college has a policy whereby the most a student would ever need to borrow is the maximum allowed by the Stafford loans (about $3,500 – $5,500 each year) and has a generous financial aid package. Even though the listed tuition is high, your debt would be very low upon graduation. You might even decide to study in Europe. Tuition for a Bachelor’s degree program student at the Angelicum, my own alma mater, is only €1320 for the whole year of 2009/2010.

Tip #3 Is A College’s Catholic Identity Important?

Know yourself. Many students who go to state colleges end up being practicing Catholics. Many students who go to expensive “Catholic” colleges end up losing their faith. Who are you, what do you stand for, and are you able to live in a mature, adult fashion without needing peer pressure to practice your faith? Maybe it’s important to you to find more potential Catholic dates at college. Whatever your goals may be, these are merely a sample of the questions you should ask yourself. And in case you’re wondering, unless you need the philosophical/theological pre-reqs for major seminary or specific degrees for particular apostolates, in most cases, your undergraduate degree is what’s important, not where you got it.

Those are the tips for today. Enjoy!

www.DoIHaveAVocation.com

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What’s So Important About Being Careful With Private Vows Or Promises?

Therese Ivers, JCL — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 01:02:33 +0000

by Therese Ivers, JCL

In one of the states of the US that I grew up in, there is a convent. In that convent are women dressed in habits. They make vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience… and they live austerely. They claim to belong to an ancient and revered Order. But, they are not nuns, and they are not sisters. As a matter of fact, they are lay women who masquerade as Roman Catholic religious. In a word, they are frauds.

There is an international group that passes themselves off as a budding religious community. Married individuals may join this so-called religious community. People who are married and think they need to somehow become religious in order to become holy and wear a habit are often referred to join this group. The website of this group has what purports to be “encouragement” from the Vatican. The way this group is set up,

Public, Semi-Public, and Private Vows and Promises

Therese Ivers, JCL — Sun, 24 May 2009 21:37:55 +0000

By Therese Ivers

One of the most frequent topics people discerning their vocation have several questions about is on vows and promises. As most people enter their vocation by means of a vow or vows, this topic is of great importance.

To begin with, all Catholics by virtue of their baptismal promises, have the obligation of rejecting sin, refusing to be mastered by sin, rejecting satan, and living out the teachings of the Catholic Church. All Catholics by virtue of their baptism, are called to strive for holiness in a manner consistent with their state in life.

Some people, perhaps the majority of people, are called to live out the general call or vocation to holiness by embracing a specific way of life through means of vow/promise, ordination, or consecration. This can be described as following a “call within the call”, or as more commonly called, following a “vocation”. It is this sense of a call to a specific way of life that the word “vocation” will be used in this article.

Vocations Entered by Public Vow(s)

Marriage and religious life are entered by means of public vow(s). In marriage, each of the (baptized) couple are the ministers of the sacrament of matrimony and by exchanging vows, enter a lifelong relationship as spouses and become “two in one flesh”. Religious profess vows to God according to their constitutions/statutes which specify how the evangelical counsels of poverty, chastity, and obedience are to be led. Diocesan hermits have the option of entering their state by vowing the three evangelical counsels by public vow, or they may choose to make public promises.

Vocation Entered by Public Promise(s)

Diocesan hermits have the option of professing public promises rather than public promises. They promise by means of a promise or sacred bond to follow the evangelical counsels of poverty, chastity, and obedience according to their rule of life.

Vocation Entered by Semi-Public Vow(s)/Promises

Members of secular institutes vow or promise the three evangelical counsels by means of semi-public vows.

Vocation Entered by Ordination in Conjunction with Public Promises

During the Rite of Ordination, those entering Orders promise obedience, and some promise celibacy.

Some Common Elements of Public and Semi-Public Vows and Promises:

Discernment is two-sided. In marriage, it is the other individual who discerns whether to accept marriage vows. It is the Church that discerns through the bishop – or legitimate authority in the different forms of consecrated life or secular institute – whether to accept vows/promises in the name of God and His Church.
Public/semi-public vows and promises either constitute a person into a formal vocation recognized in the Church, or are an important element of that way of life (such as in holy orders).
New public obligations and rights are assumed by the person making the vows/promises which flow from the nature of the vocation being entered into.

Private Vows and Promises

What is a private vow or promise? The Catechism of the Catholic Church states the following about vows:

In many circumstances, the Christian is called to make promises to God. Baptism and Confirmation, Matrimony and Holy Orders always entail promises. Out of personal devotion, the Christian may also promise to God this action, that prayer, this alms-giving, that pilgrimage, and so forth. Fidelity to promises made to God is a sign of the respect owed to the divine majesty and of love for a faithful God.

“A vow is a deliberate and free promise made to God concerning a possible and better good which must be fulfilled by reason of the virtue of religion,” A vow is an act of devotion in which the Christian dedicates himself to God or promises him some good work. By fulfilling his vows he renders to God what has been promised and consecrated to Him. The Acts of the Apostles shows us St. Paul concerned to fulfill the vows he had made.

The Church recognizes an exemplary value in the vows to practice the evangelical counsels:

Mother Church rejoices that she has within herself many men and women who pursue the Savior’s self-emptying more closely and show it forth more clearly, by undertaking poverty with the freedom of the children of God, and renouncing their own will: they submit themselves to man for the sake of God, thus going beyond what is of precept in the matter of perfection, so as to conform themselves more fully to the obedient Christ.²⁴

The Church can, in certain cases and for proportionate reasons, dispense from vows and promises^. (CCC #2101-2103)

Private vows may be made to God, then, for a “possible” and “better” good, according to the Catechism. What is “possible” in this context? Possible has several meanings. One is that a person must be free to make the promise/vow. A married person is not free to vow “chastity” (as the vow of celibacy and continence is called) because the right to the procreative powers of his/her body belongs to his/her spouse. One must be the right age to make a binding vow/promise (the minimum/maximum age will differ according to the nature of the vow/promise). The person must have an understanding of what is being promised and have sufficient deliberation.

The “better” good can encompass a lot of things. A person can promise to fast. This is a “better” good only if it is both subjectively and objectively better for the person making the vow. So, objectively, fasting is a good thing. Subjectively, it can be bad or good depending on the person and his/her circumstances. A person with hypoglycemia probably should never do a strict fast or vow one because it is “bad” for their health. The reason the Pharisee’s fasting and almsgiving talked about in the Gospel could be bad is the motivation was for show and human praise rather than the glorification of God.

Now, should a person make private vows or promises of poverty, chastity, and obedience if they do not feel called to life as a religious, member of a secular institute, or diocesan hermit? That is a million dollar question, and for it, there is no pat answer. In discerning whether to assume private vows or promises with such life changing implications, a person should give the matter the serious thought, understanding, and deliberation appropriate for taking such an action. Some things which should be considered are:

A person should undertake the responsibilities pledged by vow or promise only if they are truly called to do so by God. One of the advantages of pursuing public vow(s)/promise(s) is that the Church herself through the ministry of others (bishop, community, potential spouse) discerns whether a person may be called to a particular way of life. The process of discernment is usually lengthy so that the individual can learn about the rights and responsibilities of the life he/she wishes to enter by vow and so that the bishop, person, or community can determine if they are a good fit. In other words, a lot more formation in the evangelical counsels is available to those who pursue canonically recognized vocations.

By the same token, discerning whether to pursue lifelong commitments made by private vows/promises can be more difficult because there isn’t that in built process of formation and guidance given to people thinking of canonically recognized vocations.

It is strongly recommended that the insight and advice of a competent spiritual director be sought if one is considering assuming a private vow(s) related to the evangelical counsels. This is to ensure that one is indeed truly called by God to make it(them), that the formula and matter is valid (for example, to vow “joy” is invalid because joy is not something that can be undertaken at will), that the scope of the vow is clearly spelled out and understood, etc.
Private vows may be dispensed or commuted by the proper authorities, not by oneself.

While all Christians are called to follow the evangelical counsels in a manner befitting their state in life, not all are called to vow their strict and more radical observance for the sake of the Kingdom. Hence, it is important that it is truly God’s will, not an individual’s inclination, that brings a person to make a vow of chastity. A person should exercise great caution in vowing poverty or obedience, because how they are actually lived out must be understood in accordance with tradition and how they are to be lived should be written out so that boundaries are clearly understood.

Normally, a person should not make a vow of obedience to their spiritual director. This is because the internal and external forums are distinct and should not be confused, and there is room for grave abuse when the forums are mixed. Nor should an individual ever make a vow of secrecy or silence (not to criticize their superior or keep the details of their spiritual life/practices secret).
A private vow/promise of chastity involves a person dedicating himself to the Lord. Thus a lay person who is under private vow/promise is a “dedicated” lay person. A person whose vows are public is a member of the “consecrated state”, and thus belongs to the state which in itself is neither lay nor clerical but consecrated. A person whose vows are semi-public (members of secular institutes make these vows or promises) is a “consecrated” lay person if lay or “consecrated” ordained person if ordained, but is not a member of the consecrated state unless he/she is also a member of a religious institute, a diocesan hermit, or a consecrated virgin. In other words, “dedicated” is one making one’s vows to God unmediated through the Church. “Consecrated” is one whose vows are mediated through the Church.

So, if a person, after suitable preparation, formation, testing, discernment, advice, etc. wishes to make a private vow of chastity, then what? Because the decision should not be made lightly, valid formulas will not be listed on this site, but should be sought from a priest, spiritual director, or other expert.

www.DoIHaveAVocation.com

Discerning to Death; Tapering One’s Discernment Towards Its Conclusion

Therese Ivers, JCL — Sun, 01 Mar 2009 01:19:45 +0000

by Therese Ivers, JCL

Way back in September, I was asked to help with an upcoming retreat for women discerning their vocations and who feel like they’re beating their heads on the wall “discerning to death”. This topic really resonated with me, and as I continue to prepare for this weekend’s retreat, I am seeing more and more how although there is plenty of literature giving pieces of information about the discernment process, there is hardly anything out there that talks about how to bring it to a peaceful conclusion. The goal of discernment is to figure out God’s will in one’s life, most particularly whether God is calling one to assume a lifelong commitment by virtue of ordination, vow, or consecration. In theory figuring out one’s vocation sounds pretty straightforward, but plenty of folks agonize over it, and some have never reached a practical conclusion as to whether there is a state in life they should pursue. How exactly does a person go from the beginning to the middle and then reach the end of vocational discernment?

Vocations and the Fairy Tale

Good fairy tales touch upon the deep desires of human beings. Some are about wealth as the reward of virtue and valor, a concept that even Our Lord uses in speaking about the reward of eternal life. Others talk about longevity and an absence from the ordinary woes of life (think immortality and the properties of risen bodies). The majority, however, are about romantic love in which after trial, the princess and the prince happily live together ever after. Again, this reflects the eternal betrothal between Christ and His Church…

Yet, it never ceases to amaze me when I am judging marriage annulment cases and we get someone under oath testifying that they thought that once they got married, everything would turn out great (despite the fact their spouse was abusively beating them daily during their courtship, they were both high on drugs most of the time, that they had two or three children before they decided to get officially hitched…) simply and solely because getting married in the Church was somehow going to magically make things different! It gets worse when they blame people in the Church for their failed marriage (why didn’t the priest stop us?)! How is it that the fairy tale of living happily ever after gets drummed into people’s minds when it comes to vocational choices? I will be forever happy if I marry that person… I will automatically be holy if I become a priest… As soon as I slip on that habit or religious life emblem, I’m gonna be floating around in prayer… It seems to me that good discernment starts with understanding that fairy tales are just that. Fairy tales.

The process of discerning a vocation starts with the realization that the process usually takes knowledge, dedication, and work. Knowledge is necessary to make informed choices. How much do you as a discerner know about the vocations open to you in the Church? It takes dedication to following the will of God. It also takes effort, or work.

One can say that the time of courtship, discernment for the seminary, convent, or other form of consecrated life, is normally a time of mutual discovery. It takes work, both on the part of the person making the decision to pursue a particular path or narrow it down to a path, and of the person(s) who admit that person into vows (think marriage, religious life, diocesan hermit life, and secular institutes), consecration (consecrated virgins) and ordination (diaconate, priesthood, and episcopacy). One who is discerning should work not only at improving knowledge about vocations, but self-knowledge so that obstacles and fears may be evaluated and addressed.

The Goal

The final goal of vocational discernment is to make vows, be consecrated or be ordained if this should be the Lord’s will. Yet, the immediate goal of the discerner should be to do what it takes to determine which path (if any) to which one seems to have a genuine call and make a decision to pursue it in a prudent fashion. That way, one can peacefully but purposefully pursue a possible call and offer oneself to a concrete person, diocese, order, or institute if one prudently and prayerfully determines they could be a fit. Of course a person should be “open” in that the other person, diocese, order, or institute may determine that it is not their vocation to be united with you in their particular path to holiness.

Vocational Discernment and Paths of Love

Therese Ivers, JCL — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 10:04:21 +0000

by Therese Ivers, JCL

Is the vocation to the priesthood objectively higher than that to the married state? How do you know if your vocation is to be a priest, a mother, a sister, or a brother? Versatile paper napkins doubled as writing pads for some who needed to quickly scribble a diagram or note and the rattle of dishes and smell of “dorm food” accompanied the discussion a small group of us students had in the cafeteria on different aspects of vocations to the priesthood and consecrated life. Since this was a college, this was a question worthy of the academic mind and research. It was also a practical question for us as we tried to envision life after graduation from an institution that has an average of at least 10% of its graduates pursuing vocations. We grappled with the idea of different paths in life in twos, threes, or larger groups and shared the fruit of our research with others.

Ten years later, I caught sight of one of the students I had had intellectual tussles with on various subjects including that of vocations. Joseph Bolin was walking down the courtyard of my university in Rome, stopping by for a brief visit to the campus. We caught up with the news of our respective lives and then renewed our discussion on the process of vocational discernment. It was refreshing to hear his views on the process, and they had certainly had been polished over the years to the point where I agreed with much of what he had to say on the matter.

Not long after my encounter with Mr. Bolin, he sent me a copy of his work on discerning vocations that he was preparing for publication called Paths of Love: The Discernment of Vocation According to Aquinas, Ignatius, and Pope John Paul II. I read it and it is a gem of a book. This book synthesizes the thought of St. Ignatius, Pope John Paul II, and St. Thomas Aquinas and their different approaches on vocational discernment and resolves apparent conflicts in the different ways the saints over the centuries have talked about following God’s call in life. At the end, practical advice is given for discerners to consider for their faith journey.

Because this is a website dedicated to helping the discerner make an informed choice, from time to time a book, CD, or DVD will be mentioned that we feel could be helpful. In this case, I believe that this book on vocational discernment is a good one to use as a guide for understanding the thought of some of the most influential spiritual leaders on vocations. That being said, it does take careful reading and will give a deeper and richer knowledge of the discernment process if read well.

As a work on the different answers St. Ignatius, St. Thomas Aquinas, and John Paul II give to the question on how to know your vocation, this book is a gem. It is not, however, an encyclopedia on vocational discernment. Thus, it focuses mostly on different approaches these people have had towards discernment and so there are other aspects of different vocations that are not covered in this book. In addition, the book has the limitation in that the author restricts himself to speaking about vocations to the priesthood, religious life, and marriage. However, one can expand the notion of “priesthood” to “clerical state” and “religious life” to “consecrated life” as there is a call to the diaconate and other forms of consecrated life.

For those who believe that this book may be helpful to them, I recommend you give it a try. I wrote this unsolicited book review because I felt that this book may be beneficial to some of DoIHaveAVocation.com’s readers as I have personally found few books on discernment that are worth reading. This is one of those books which I find worthwhile although not absolutely essential for the Catholic library, and so I hope some of you will find it useful in your faith journey.